Out Of The Mouth Of Ains: True Colors

"Mommy, what are my school's colors?"

I was surprised that Ainsley doesn't know this; I have bought hair bows in her school colors to add some spice to her clothes those days that she just wears solid navy pants instead of her unform jumper, which features the school colors in a tastefull, subtle plaid. She was in her jumper when she asked me this this morning, so I pointed to the red and gold stripes running through the navy plaid.

"Your school's colors are red and gold," I said. "See? They're in your jumper. I thought you knew that."

It turns out the two little girls across the street, who I have nicknamed The Pestilentia because they're, well, pests, were talking about the school colors at their Catholic elementary school.

"They said their school's colors were pink and gold, and they had me confused."

"Why were you confused?"

"Their school color can't be pink," Ainsley said. "It has to be blue, black, white, red, or sometimes purple because those are the Catholic colors."

Ah, Catholicism. Prescribing even the most minor details of life, including accepted color schemes, to its devoted followers since the 4th century.

And what, pray tell, is a Protestant color? Fuschia? Chartreuse? Day-Glo orange?