Be Afraid. Be Very Afraid.

Happy Halloween, y'all! Cranky has invited some classes in for my annual horror genre lesson today, and I just showed the classic "Talking Tina" episode of The Twlight Zone for the 4th time. Wahoo! Though if I have to watch a TZ episode 6 times in one day, that's a good one. It's still quite creepy 44 years later.

Despite my love of horror movies, I am a big chicken. I am afraid of a lot. So in honor of the scariest day of the year, I thought I would share (I initially wrote scare!) some of my phobias. Chime in with your own in the comments section!

1. Spiders. Especially large ones that hang out in bathtubs. Or shoes. Or that look like a piece of string, causing me to reach down and almost pick them up, only to have them unfurl eight furry legs and scamper under the couch, leaving me with the horrifying thought, "I almost picked up a spider!"

2. Fire.

3. Flying on airplanes. Mostly because when things go wrong, the crash is almost always fiery, and so we go back to number 2.

4. Small children with supernatural or psychic abilities. Or that talk to the dead. Or are possessed by Satan. Oh, hell, I'll admit it: all children are a little freaky, including my own. They've got those wee beady eyes, and those innocent little voices...

5. Driving over the Brent Spence bridge going south into Kentucky. Especially in the left lane, where you can see just how far your car would fall into the water if you, oopsie! crashed into the concrete barrier and busted through it. Or if the bridge collapsed. (When are they building the new I-71/75 bride? Another decade? Fabulous.)

6. Getting bags under my eyes in the aging process.

7. Plastic surgery. (See why I'm afraid of number 6?)

8. My laundry room after dark. Not because it's downstairs and has no windows and no one could hear me scream...I just hate doing laundry, and the piles of dirty clothes look so much more overwhelming in the dark. OK, it's partly because it's downstairs and has no windows...

9. Undercooked fish and poultry.

10. Loss. Of children, friends, my husband, my family, my car keys, my purse, my sanity...

Speak up, hollow weiners. What gets in your face and says, "Boo!"