These are the things that convince me there is a God, or at least something Karma-ish. Whatever it is that powers the universe has a wicked sense of humor and strong sense of divine retribution.
We just came in from a fire drill here at school. We were waiting to be told to go back in when I heard a student say,
"Mrs. Cranky, you have a spider on your leg."
Since said student was standing next to the teacher also known as Rambling Shan in the comments, the teacher who I go to with all my "big spider" stories, I thought she had egged this child on to say the one thing that would make me flip my lid.
I smiled at her and said something like, "Yeah, yeah, sure it is," and then looked down.
Indeed, there was a largish spider at mid-thigh.
Not a spider, technically, but a daddy long-legs, which a helpful teacher told me later are actually more venemous and harmful to humans than the vast majority of spider species. Thanks.
Still, there were a bunch of legs crawling all up on my person.
I screamed. And I mean screamed. As though I were being stabbed.
This was in front of many, many students and teachers.
After screaming, and shaking the damn thing off my leg, I went to Rambling Shan and hid behind her for no reason I can really recall right now except that she was there. I do not keep a cool head in such situations.
I just know this was my cosmic punishment for hiring a hitman to take out the Basement Behemoth of 2008. Ha, ha, God! Joke's on me.