Things I Never Thought I'd Buy

You know you're officially middle-aged when you find yourself in the following predicament:

It's 6:00 on a Sunday evening. You are in your local Target, scouting out checkout lines, because several students in your high school work there and one of the things you are buying is a certain ointment that has a letter of the alphabet in the name that treats a certain condition that is largely unmentionable but rhymes with "asteroid."

It was for my undereye circles. Of course.

Either way, I am too young to have this in my cart, y'all.

Chalk this up there with fiber supplements, a station wagon, Sominex, and magazines that feature recipes instead of fashion and "how to make him want you" tips. They're all in that growing category of Really Uncool Things I Never Thought I'd Buy But Then I Had A Kid.

Alright, 30-somethings. Name one thing you've bought that shows you're not a carefree young thing anymore.