Tuesday, March 31, 2009

My Murtaugh List

Anybody watch How I Met Your Mother last night? (I think that might be the best little sitcom that no one watches.)

The episode centered around Ted's Murtaugh List. Remember Danny Glover's character from the Lethal Weapon movies? Roger Murtaugh? He often said, "I'm too old for this sh*t!" just before helping the younger Riggs do some crazy bit of police work. Inspired by that catchphrase, Ted made a list of all the things, as someone in his early thirties, he could get away with in his twenties but is now too old to do.

Much of the list resonated with me. Things like: Pull an all-nighter. Put off going to the doctor. Dying your hair a crazy color. Beer bong (not so much the bong part, because I've never tried that, but the excessive consumption of beer part.)

The last few years, I've started really feeling my age. Yeah, I'm only 35 and probably take better care of myself now than 10 years ago. But that's because I have to. If I don't take care of myself now, things start hurting or falling apart or accumulating fat. I can't just shake it off like I used to.

So, here is my Murtaugh List. Chime in with your own below.

1. Order the country-fried steak.
2. Wear a bikini.
3. Jump off the diving board.
4. Shop in the Juniors department.
5. Go bra-less.
6. Sunbathe with baby oil instead of SPF 30.
7. Ride questionably-maintained carnival rides.

Now you: What kind of sh*t are you getting too old for?

1 comment:

Robert K. said...

1) Grow a ponytail. True, that's more of a "I'm too balding for this sh*t" issue. But even if I COULD still grow my hair out, I have to look professional for work.
2) Call in sick just because I don't feel like going to work. The pitfalls of actually having some responsibility.
3) Sleep on the couch or floor. I spent several months sleeping on Eric Gauthier's couch back in 1998. Now my back will be out for days if I don't sleep flat on a pillowtop mattress.